Saturday, April 17, 2010

The Sweetest Thing

It's been one of those days. Two days actually. Yesterday Marlee was fussy and clingy and I couldn't pacify her. Today, Jencee threw a dozen fits.

I've typed and re-typed the sequence of events from today and all that happened with my ever fragile firstborn. The fits aren't important. What's important is that I didn't manage her or myself well.

Today, I roared at my kid. "Stoooooop Crying!!!" She was upset about wearing shoes. I'd explained myself over and over and tried to reason with her. "We are going to a birthday party and it's 50 degrees outside. You. must. wear. shoes." I ran out of patience and me yelling over her wailing wasn't working. So, I roared, "Stoooooop Crying!!!". Her fit was eventually over. We went on with our day.

Tonight, after I put the girls to bed I did my nightly routine of loading the dishwasher, picking up toys, checking email. I ran across this blog post and was hit in the gut. I cried. I asked God to forgive me. To grant me discipline in controlling my frustration. To help me be a better Mom. A better person.

I went to see if Jencee was still awake so I could apologize. She was on the floor outside her room waiting for permission to go potty. I brought her to my chair and sat her in my lap and cried. I said, "Mommy's sorry for yelling at you today." She touched a tear running down my face and asked what it was (sounds dramatic but that's really how it happened :)). I explained that it was tears and that I was sad. I told her that it made Mommy's heart hurt that I had yelled at her. I said in a quivering voice, "Mommy loves you very much." She stared at me a moment and then gave me the biggest tightest hug.

It was truly the sweetest thing.

The sweetest act of love that filled my cup to overflowing.

How does a three year old know compassion?

Monday, April 12, 2010

They Say It's Your Birthday!

Why yes. Yes it is!

I'm thirty...ahem...one. Or as Jencee says, "firty-one". This morning as she was picking out her clothes she asked what she was going to wear to my party. We were both a little disappointed that there will be no party.

Yes. I'm one of THOSE people who want to celebrate everything. Including myself. :) I always want an excuse to get together with anyone I love and eat and play!

If I were going to have a party for myself it would be Greek themed. I'd fly all my friends and family to Greece where we'd all wear togas and skinny dip off the island of Santorini. (You think I'm kidding. I'm not. You had no idea what being a friend of mine required. Don't worry - a Greek trip paid for by me is never gonna happen. And I won't ask you to skinny dip anywhere other than Santorini.)

If ever you are invited to a party for me you won't see 'No Gifts Please' printed delicately at the bottom of the invitation. I say "Bring 'Em!"

If you are wondering what gift you should get me for my birthday here are a few suggestions.

-Flying me and all my family and friends to Greece
-a makeover and all new makeup from Sephora
-a new camera that downloads itself onto my computer
-a $13,000 dental workover
-Long, thick, wavy hair
-a maid
-a personal trainer
-Reese Witherspoon to be my BFF
-new outdoor furniture
-a double oven
-a kitchen-aid mixer in a saucy color
-Ree Drummond to live in my house and cook for me and take pics of my kids
-a new wardrobe (but I'll keep my shoes thank you very much)
-stationary
-a fully loaded Suburban with two tvs and a driver
-a winning lottery ticket

Just a few simple suggestions. That's all.

In all seriousness, I have everything I need and most of what I want. My beautiful family is gift enough this birthday!

BUT if you feel you must send a gift, email me and I'll forward you my address.

Friday, April 9, 2010

So...

I haven't posted in awhile. Why? There's so much that I want to blog about but then I don't. And then I feel like I can't blog about the next thing because I didn't post about the last thing. Make Sense? Perfect.

I really wanted to do cute blogs all about my girls birthday parties...in January. My friend, Georgia blogged about Jencee's and Marlee's parties and posted tons of pics...because she was my photographer for the day. Thanks G-rock. You, well, Rock!

I would've really liked to have posted about the life and death of my Uncle Bob. But my sister Jennie wrote about it on her blog and she's a much more eloquent writer than I.

I never posted all of our Christmas stuff, my brother's homecoming or more about our trip to New Orleans. Do I go back??? I feel like I shouldn't move forward without covering what's behind.

But alas! I shall. I'll move forward forgetting about the past. Well, not forgetting altogether just in this blog world. At least so I can blog again!

A friend recently posted, "Why do we blog, anyway?"

Yes. Why, indeed?